Village Journals
Resonate your identity with Naseeb journals. Express your opinions, share your thoughts, post your writings and connect with like minded people through the power of expression.
Resonate your identity with Naseeb journals. Express your opinions, share your thoughts, post your writings and connect with like minded people through the power of expression.
A Note from Sajjadmatin
Sajjad requested that I post the following in this village. He says he loves you all but can't take the time out of his busy schedule to call every single one of you and let you know what happened to Sajjadmatin. Let us make du'a that Sajjadmatin has moved on to a better place, iA. Like Jdate.com.
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Normally long stories suck. And so do stories without explosions, firefights or dead hookers. So let me apologize to you up front, this story has none of those. Well it does, but she was already dead when I walked into the kitchen; so it really isnt cogent to the current discussion. It does, however, end with me getting removed from the naseeb.
So i was on Haris? journal, where he makes fun of the naseeb and the upcoming naseeb party and how lame 786, azhar usman and monis are. I noticed that the latest comments were from two people i had never, ever before seen. They were Yasmeen and Drbilalyo. This is how I remember their comments:
Yasmeen: I just talked to Azhar and he says he has written up totally new material for the Naseeb party.
Drbilalyo: Yeah, can you believe the prices for the CAMP dinner? I?m glad I bought my tickets for the Naseeb party for only $23. See you there!
Yasmeen: I know, $95 is way too much. I know I?m going to the Naseeb Party. It?s going to be great!!!
Ummm yeah... alls we needed were two midget twins, Tony Robbins? chin, and a guy with a British accent wearing a lab coat to make this little infomercial complete. So i called Drbilalyo out for this blatant naseeb propaganda. And then I logged on to my fake profiles and proceeded to waste time and bandwidth:
Isabelle_: wow! so you mean that for the price of 37 bagels I get the non-stick grill, the polarized sunglasses, the fuel injector cleaning additive AND unlimited conversations with horny desi fobs?
Locutus: Oh! But that?s not all!
The_bruce: You mean there?s more?
Locutus: That?s right, Robert the 17th Earl of Bruce, if you act now we will also mail you some of Monis? anal polyps.
Something stupid of that nature. And then I realized that my fake profiles had suddenly been deactived. I went back to Haris? journal and commented that some assmonger from the naseeb had deleted my fake profiles. That?s when Drbilalyo left a weird, uber-nerd response:
Sajjadmatin: As much as i would like to finish this meaningless version of Masterpiece Theatre, alas i cannot. The catamites at the naseeb deleted my fake profiles of Isabelle_ and Locutus.
Drbilalyo: haha you triggered the multiple logon detection wire.
(i got pissed that some pedicant administrator from the naseeb was screwing around with my fake profiles so i responded,)
The_bruce: haha you triggered your own internal douchebag wire.
(yeah, that was the best i could come up with. i dont know, i kinda like the word douchebag. Also, i was pressed for time. The_bruce was deactivated right after I left that comment. He was actually my favorite fake profile. Inna lillahi wa inna ?alayhi rajioon.)
Now let me clarify a point about these fake profiles; they were all characters from Braveheart, the TV show Stargate:SG1 or were other famous TV show characters. They were never meant to overtly deceive people like the Missche profile does. Momokam, c?mon bro, it?s getting a tad bit old, we all know it?s you.
Then I went back to Haris? journal and noticed that comments were being deleted one by one. I thought it was Haris being a tool. Because he does things like that. But he swore on BobaFett?s jetpack that it wasnt him. I can only fear the solemnity of such a grave oath.
Then, to wrap up this needlessly long journal, I found that my own profile had been deactivated. I logged onto another of my fake profiles (one that, can we all thank Allah for his mercy, had not been deactivated) and found that I, sajjadmatin, no longer existed.
So now i am alone, in the naseeb withdrawal. It is a sign. A sign from Allah that I should not be wasting precious time on the naseeb but instead go back and polish up my Jdate.com profile. Indeed Allah is the best of planners.
I just want you, whoever you may be, to remember me. And when you tell others about me, tell them...that...that I was filled with naught but love and a tender affinity toward my fellow man. And also that i was 6?2? and weighed 200 lbs. Oh, and that i was a hafiz. Better make it a 6?3? hafiz, and not one of those desi huffaz who muddles all the words quickly together, but a good one. Who knew ninjitsu. And drove a Porsche.
___________________________________
Normally long stories suck. And so do stories without explosions, firefights or dead hookers. So let me apologize to you up front, this story has none of those. Well it does, but she was already dead when I walked into the kitchen; so it really isnt cogent to the current discussion. It does, however, end with me getting removed from the naseeb.
So i was on Haris? journal, where he makes fun of the naseeb and the upcoming naseeb party and how lame 786, azhar usman and monis are. I noticed that the latest comments were from two people i had never, ever before seen. They were Yasmeen and Drbilalyo. This is how I remember their comments:
Yasmeen: I just talked to Azhar and he says he has written up totally new material for the Naseeb party.
Drbilalyo: Yeah, can you believe the prices for the CAMP dinner? I?m glad I bought my tickets for the Naseeb party for only $23. See you there!
Yasmeen: I know, $95 is way too much. I know I?m going to the Naseeb Party. It?s going to be great!!!
Ummm yeah... alls we needed were two midget twins, Tony Robbins? chin, and a guy with a British accent wearing a lab coat to make this little infomercial complete. So i called Drbilalyo out for this blatant naseeb propaganda. And then I logged on to my fake profiles and proceeded to waste time and bandwidth:
Isabelle_: wow! so you mean that for the price of 37 bagels I get the non-stick grill, the polarized sunglasses, the fuel injector cleaning additive AND unlimited conversations with horny desi fobs?
Locutus: Oh! But that?s not all!
The_bruce: You mean there?s more?
Locutus: That?s right, Robert the 17th Earl of Bruce, if you act now we will also mail you some of Monis? anal polyps.
Something stupid of that nature. And then I realized that my fake profiles had suddenly been deactived. I went back to Haris? journal and commented that some assmonger from the naseeb had deleted my fake profiles. That?s when Drbilalyo left a weird, uber-nerd response:
Sajjadmatin: As much as i would like to finish this meaningless version of Masterpiece Theatre, alas i cannot. The catamites at the naseeb deleted my fake profiles of Isabelle_ and Locutus.
Drbilalyo: haha you triggered the multiple logon detection wire.
(i got pissed that some pedicant administrator from the naseeb was screwing around with my fake profiles so i responded,)
The_bruce: haha you triggered your own internal douchebag wire.
(yeah, that was the best i could come up with. i dont know, i kinda like the word douchebag. Also, i was pressed for time. The_bruce was deactivated right after I left that comment. He was actually my favorite fake profile. Inna lillahi wa inna ?alayhi rajioon.)
Now let me clarify a point about these fake profiles; they were all characters from Braveheart, the TV show Stargate:SG1 or were other famous TV show characters. They were never meant to overtly deceive people like the Missche profile does. Momokam, c?mon bro, it?s getting a tad bit old, we all know it?s you.
Then I went back to Haris? journal and noticed that comments were being deleted one by one. I thought it was Haris being a tool. Because he does things like that. But he swore on BobaFett?s jetpack that it wasnt him. I can only fear the solemnity of such a grave oath.
Then, to wrap up this needlessly long journal, I found that my own profile had been deactivated. I logged onto another of my fake profiles (one that, can we all thank Allah for his mercy, had not been deactivated) and found that I, sajjadmatin, no longer existed.
So now i am alone, in the naseeb withdrawal. It is a sign. A sign from Allah that I should not be wasting precious time on the naseeb but instead go back and polish up my Jdate.com profile. Indeed Allah is the best of planners.
I just want you, whoever you may be, to remember me. And when you tell others about me, tell them...that...that I was filled with naught but love and a tender affinity toward my fellow man. And also that i was 6?2? and weighed 200 lbs. Oh, and that i was a hafiz. Better make it a 6?3? hafiz, and not one of those desi huffaz who muddles all the words quickly together, but a good one. Who knew ninjitsu. And drove a Porsche.
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