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Resonate your identity with Naseeb journals. Express your opinions, share your thoughts, post your writings and connect with like minded people through the power of expression.
children or not?
i was watching king of queens the other day, i don't know if it was a re-run or a new one, but they're trying to have kids and are not succeding. i guess we all know a story about a couple that's trying and not getting anywhere.
so anyway, i was thinking... if you've always wanted to have kids, but you find out the love of your life (bf, gf/fiance) can't have kids naturally, would you still marry them or would you throw the love out the window and look for someone else?
so anyway, i was thinking... if you've always wanted to have kids, but you find out the love of your life (bf, gf/fiance) can't have kids naturally, would you still marry them or would you throw the love out the window and look for someone else?
Comments on this journal
Even in the case of modern families today, I wonder what the ruling is if step-siblings fall in love with each other?
mostly when people talk about adoption being haram they refer too either the hadith (parapharsing here) that talks about not swindling an orphan of his inheritance by taking him in and using it for yourself.
or - as you seem to be imlying, hte mixed lineage.
cause we are not allowed to marry our sisters and whatnot and if two orphans are taken into differnt homes and their last names are changed, they can, theoretically, end up marrying each other.
those seem to be the cases people refer too. i don't know if thats what your friend was going on about though.
obviously both can be avoided, and as for lineage, i have no doubt that if i really wanted someone to bear my name, i would have absolutely no problem finding a baby with my last name, a fairly common one, even better if your last name is mohammad.
and please, don't swindle an orphan, that would b ebad.
if i loved the woman, i would not get rid of her.
if i did not love her, but it was merely an issue of convinience and her good looks, then i would say "adios" and look for another convinient looker.
say whatever you want, but a lot of marriages are based on convinience and looks.
I was just being honest. Not being able to see a physical piece of myself - my lips or my eyes or my dimple etc... means a lot to me.
Becoming a foster parent would be a cool challenge, but permanent adoption seems too daunting...
When most babies are nothing but a loud noise at one end, and a big mess at the other... minor details like who's DNA they are carrying are likely to be the last thing on my mind.
I have to have my own children. Even the thought of marrying someone with kids is frightening. How can anyone expect me to love somebody else's child as if it were my own.
As for adoption, people make it sound like they are going out and buying a cabbage patch kid. This is a permanent thing, you cant give it away after a year... and are stuck with a total stranger's kid. Who knows what the parents were like (psychotics, druggies, etc...)?? And god knows if your kid is going to turn out to be a serial killer. A lot of behavioral attributes are inherited as well as diseases and illnesses. I want a healthy child (mentally and physically).
My very very very last, desperate option if ALL else fails would be to adopt and that too from people I know (hopefully take a relatives child). Thats that!
* I need to learn how to be more PC*