Dating with Intent

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 8:12pm)

thanks for the advice everyone.. I agree telling your parents early on is useful, and I wasn't promoting dating (just needed a title word).. I think you have to get to know the person face to face a little, istikhara and faith in God are good concepts, but you need to be able to see people to judge at least a bit of their personality + to find out if they tunr out to be who they say they are when you chat to them..

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 7:34pm)

Attend the Fiqh of Love taught in Al-Maghrib to know

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 7:24pm)

agree with LadyDervesh about Istikhara and Pray for Allah Tallah's guidance..... True only Allah knows what is best for us.

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 7:10pm)

Few of us were already discussing this topic. Check this link
www.naseeb.com

Check the JE "Do you believe in Dating?"

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 6:10pm)

hmm! i would disagree, please, lets not get excited over here. I quote ladydarvesh "is not hallal". Who is to say what is hallal and what is not, can anyone be absolutly certian as to what hallal is, and what is not. I dont think so; so lets keep the discussion to where every one can handle it :o)

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 2:37pm)

Dating even with the intent of getting married is not Hallal. The best way is to first chat online and talk on the phone a couple of times and then if you feel that the person might be good for you and you like him/her to some extend , Do Istikhara and Pray for Allah Tallah's guidance. People are very good at hiding their true nature and at pretending to be what they are not and only Allah Tallah knows what is in ones heart and Only Allah Tallah knows what is best for us.

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 11:42am)

the human shaparon days are long gone, now a day internet is filling in as the shaparon, live webcast, wemeetings, blogs, emails, e-photo albums take almost the whole thing to the safest level there needs to be. Then as phase II the human contact can be introduced (based of the person's past communications, and behaviours).

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 10:53am)

come on we are all grownup here...we could control our impulses(most of us)...I think if you do wanna know each other then do it in a public place like a coffee shop or a resturant...in the beginning try to go out for lunch or go out in daylight...daylight doesn't give other person the wrong idea either...then when you are comfortable with each other then go to dinner...always date in public place even if you guys want to have a dream date at lake shore then try to go at a time when their are people around...

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 9:50am)

If you are truely intending to head towards a 'long term relationship' aka, marriage, and you want to proceed to the proper way islamically, then one safe bet is to let your parents know that you are talking to someone for that purpose. This doesn't mean engagement, it just means getting to know each other better to decide if you are right for each other. This way, now that your paretns know whats up, it'll be easier to behave, and harder to misbehave. And under no circumstances should you be alone in a private area.

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 9:00am)

Begsy!!! I am shocked girl... behave! :P It's a fair comment though, that's partly why I asked the question.. how do you ensure you keep it decent / meet in public and don't head off back to yours/ his place at some later date.. as I would want to ensure we behave and are trying to head towards a long term/ Islamic relationship instead of a fling..

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 5:04am)

What happens if you can't keep your hands off each other!..

Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 1:26am)

It's very important to be honest. The reason is caz Sometimes a LIFE time is not enough to know someone and sometimes, one smile or second is more then enough to know.

Login to find out (May 5, 2005 at 4:27pm)

keep the convos at a friendly level, dont talk about how many kids u want in the futer or what schools u want to send ur little ones. . . Stick with whats ur take and that. Let ur intentions be known that ur looking for a good convo buddy. . .

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