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Interfaith marriages...


Can people of two different faiths really live happily ever after or is they just kidding themselves?
 

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Login to find out (June 30, 2005 at 10:55pm)
Let's revisit this discussion. Does anyone know any interfaith couples who've survived their marriages? How are they raising their kids?
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 5:11pm)
I know its very very complex... i come from a liberal family living in europe and asia for a number of generations but even then we have our problems.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 5:07pm)
I'm not, by any means, saying that people of different faiths shouldn't marry; they just have to be aware of how complex the situation that they are getting into is.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 5:06pm)
Plus, when they do eventually pick a side, all hell breaks loose on the other side.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:57pm)
no i mean on the religion side as well. Yeah culturally they are very confused but they cant take sides in religion either.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:54pm)
but isnt that a different matter all together? that may be more of a cultural issue than a religious one.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:36pm)
I dunno Ifrit... i have some cuzs who are bloody confused! They always complain about not being able to fit in anywhere.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:35pm)
i think from a religious perspective the children should be raised to know both religions. when they are old enough they can decide for themselves which they choose to follow. admittedly it's easy for me to say because i actively chose and DECIDED on my religious beliefs. it isnt a perfect solution by any means.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:24pm)
I KNOW!!! I think in our culture even if we are liberal enuff to accept one general faith there are people who always always end up messing with our marriage and having their say one way or another. Its unfortunate but its true and it happens!
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:18pm)
Isn't it unfortunate? Ah, if only we were all of one faith.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:15pm)
I think that is why people should make sure where they are with this issue before they say "I DO"... but then again "true" love is blind and there are many times when u dont really think about all that... the issue of religion and culture goes and sits in the back somewhere... simmering in low heat... until its too late!
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:08pm)
But if one partner isn't converting to the other's religion, things can get very sticky when the kids come around. I would think that's where the honeymoon ends.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 4:05pm)
One of the ways would be to make sure the parents decide before tehy get married what religion they want to follow.... because we (whether we accept it or not) impact what our children grow up believing.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 3:55pm)
But what about the kids? What is the solution to raising children with parents from two different religious backgrounds?
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 3:54pm)
I dont know i think love is very lopsided!!! U can love someone endlessly and u can think that she is the most perfect person in the world but for some reason u never get the same in return.... I think that sincerity has lost its power in todays relationships... I am not sure how we are judged... when we meet somebody for the first time after speaking for months on naseeb are we judged on the basis of ???? I dont know... i thought that love was the power that could bridge continents but apparently in reality people seem to look for so much more. I guess some people like me are just pretty naive. I used to think that if u love somebody 100% she will love u back...

T-Dog I am really sorry about ur situation... u know I believe that things happen for a reason and the worst thing we can do is to slice and dice it... it all amounts to nothing... we must eventually move on... there is always a silver lining out there somewhere...
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 2:38pm)
But then I have a prejudice for saying these things: I wanna marry a desi. Lol...
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 2:38pm)
Reagents, hopefully that would have come up long before the falling in love part did. My husband and I spoke of our different religions from the beginning, our cultural backgrounds, our histories, our thoughts about politics, etc, etc.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 2:37pm)
My husband and I aren't splitting because of any problems with our religions, but rather because of other reasons. If we didn't have those issues (which are the same as many other divorcees) then we'd still be together. We were talking last night and we were both very sorry to see our marriage end, but we were making each other miserable together.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 2:35pm)
I think they can live happily ever after... but I agree with Ifrit the kid issue is central for that happily ever after dream. I know a few family friends who married into different cultures and religons and they seem to be doing alrite. I had a grandfather (moms moms bro) who in the 1920s married a British lady and they lived happily for the rest of their lives... I know of some people who married into a different religon and culture adn ended up in a divorce... one of them was in a very bitter custody battle that nearly destroyed him. I think before marrying into a different religon, etc one must ask the question if he or she is willing to go the extra step to understand and respect the other person's faith.
 
Login to find out (June 3, 2005 at 1:26pm)
interfaith marriages can work, as chocogurl said, with mutual respect. religion isnt as all consuming as many beleive. how the children will be raised is a central issue. these can also be a source of discontent later on in the marriage. just a caviat.