I came across a very interesting section of Dennis Miller's book about relationship. Here is one of the excerpt from it:


I am going to tell you once and only once what MEN really want women to be:

1) Angelina Jolie in the bedroom,
2) Julia Childs in the kitchen,
3) Hazel around the house,
4) Lesley Visser during a game,
5) Mary Poppins for the children,
6) Cha Cha Muldowney in traffic,
7) Dr. Quinn, Medicine Chick when we're sick,
8) Mary Tyler at work,
9) Mother Theresa when we come home with leprosy,
10) Gertrude Stein in conversation,
11) The body of Sophia Loren in 'Boy on a Dolphin' combined with the voice of Sade,
and to top it all off,
13) The IQ of Anna Nicole Smith, because of course we don't want to feel too threatened.

The last one is the most desirable quality.

1. We want you to understand that we don't give a shiit about clothes, all right? Yours OR ours. All we need is one pair of tennies and one pair of party shoes. That's it.
2. Don't talk to us while the television is on, all right? Very simple: Television is off, we talk. Television is on, we don't talk.
3. When you're behind the wheel of a car, if you want to get aggressive, that's fine, but don't give somebody the finger and expect me to defend your honor when Steroid Lad comes over swinging a pair of nun chucks, all right?
4. Would it kill you to watch The Godfather with me for the fifty-seventh time?
5. Hey I'm sorry, but some of us see a beautiful sunset and think, "You know, I betcha my accountant is boning me up the A$$."
6. You go see Nell by yourself, all right? I met enough chicks like that at The Drink when I was single.
7. Have a sense of humor. Without a sense of humor, a relationship lasts about as long David Duke at a Black Panther meeting.
8. Work out your job-related anger before we have sex. Just because Helmut, the office boy, brought you the cup of lima bean consomm? instead of the bowl of lima bean consomm? from Soup Plantation, I don't want to end up in the friction burn groin ward at Cedars-Sinai, all right?
9. Don't ask us to cry. As much as you say you want us to cry, you don't really want us to cry. You hate it when we cry. I've tried crying in front of my wife. She enjoyed it for about thirty seconds and then started thinking, "Why in the fcuk did I marry this hamster?"
10. Be patient. Hold us. Love us unconditionally. Help us out of this testosterone-induced fog we dwell in and lead us into the light.



However what I concluded about what WOMEN wants MEN to be:

Let's see, the myth is that women want:

Brad Pitt in the bedroom,
Brad Pitt in the kitchen,
Brad Pitt around the house,
Brad Pitt during a game,
Brad Pitt when they're sick,
Brad Pitt in conversation,
The body of Brad Pitt in 'Legends of the Fall' combined with the voice of Brad Pitt,
and to top it all off the IQ of Fabio on two bottles of NyQuil.



Disclaimer (Saving my A$$ests)


This is only an excerpt. I really necessarily DONOT agree with him (entirely), however, some of this is really funny.