Village Journals
Resonate your identity with Naseeb journals. Express your opinions, share your thoughts, post your writings and connect with like minded people through the power of expression.
Resonate your identity with Naseeb journals. Express your opinions, share your thoughts, post your writings and connect with like minded people through the power of expression.
What the Qur'an Says
What the Qur'an Says Regarding Domestic Abuse:
Men are the maintainers of women because Allah has made some of them to excel others and because they spend out of their property; the good women are therefore obedient, guarding the unseen as Allah has guarded; and (as to) those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them, and leave them alone in the sleeping-places and beat them; then if they obey you, do not seek a way against them; surely Allah is High, Great.
Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all).
Men are in charge of women, because Allah hath made the one of them to excel the other, and because they spend of their property (for the support of women). So good women are the obedient, guarding in secret that which Allah hath guarded. As for those from whom ye fear rebellion, admonish them and banish them to beds apart, and scourge them. Then if they obey you, seek not a way against them. Lo! Allah is ever High, Exalted, Great.
In verse 228 of al-Baqarah Allah says that women also have rights as men have but men are a degree above women. In this verse it is again stated that men are the guardians of women as He has made the male sex excel over the female sex. This is the will of an all-wise and almighty Lord.
The equality before law should not be confused with the equality of the complex of subjective and original qualities. Even the messengers and prophets of Allah are not equal in status due to their innate and endowed essence. "We have made some of these messengers to excel others", says the almighty , Allah in verse 253 of al-Baqarah.
Qanitatun means devoted to Allah, therefore, a woman who obeys Allah must accept His command and acknowledge her duties she has to perform to please her husband who spends of his wealth to provide for her. She must also watch over his property and his interests, attend to his needs, and above all guard her chastity.
In case a perverse woman (wife) refuses to mend her ways (very common among the low-bred and ignorant women of easy virtue) then the husband can admonish her, and even stop sleeping with her, but if the corrective measures fail to refine her, he can take harsher steps to make her qanitatun (devoted and obedient to Allah).
To understand the true purport of this verse, it is essential to keep in mind verse 21 of al-Rum.
"Another of His signs is that He created out of you mates of your own kind so that you may find repose in them, and has instilled (ordained) love and kindness between you. Verily there are signs in this for those who reflect."
In many verses it has been ordained to, treat women with kindness and to speak to them gently.
The Holy Prophet said:
"Never beat Allah's handmaidens."
"The best of you is he who is kind to his wife."
There is not a single event of wife-beating or child-abuse in the lives of the Holy Prophet and his holy Ahl ul Bayt.
Fala tabghu alayhinna is a warning to the unscrupulous husbands not to seek an excuse for resorting to the conditional provision allowed to discipline the depraved women only.
Men are the maintainers of women because Allah has made some of them to excel others and because they spend out of their property; the good women are therefore obedient, guarding the unseen as Allah has guarded; and (as to) those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them, and leave them alone in the sleeping-places and beat them; then if they obey you, do not seek a way against them; surely Allah is High, Great.
Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (Next), refuse to share their beds, (And last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all).
Men are in charge of women, because Allah hath made the one of them to excel the other, and because they spend of their property (for the support of women). So good women are the obedient, guarding in secret that which Allah hath guarded. As for those from whom ye fear rebellion, admonish them and banish them to beds apart, and scourge them. Then if they obey you, seek not a way against them. Lo! Allah is ever High, Exalted, Great.
In verse 228 of al-Baqarah Allah says that women also have rights as men have but men are a degree above women. In this verse it is again stated that men are the guardians of women as He has made the male sex excel over the female sex. This is the will of an all-wise and almighty Lord.
The equality before law should not be confused with the equality of the complex of subjective and original qualities. Even the messengers and prophets of Allah are not equal in status due to their innate and endowed essence. "We have made some of these messengers to excel others", says the almighty , Allah in verse 253 of al-Baqarah.
Qanitatun means devoted to Allah, therefore, a woman who obeys Allah must accept His command and acknowledge her duties she has to perform to please her husband who spends of his wealth to provide for her. She must also watch over his property and his interests, attend to his needs, and above all guard her chastity.
In case a perverse woman (wife) refuses to mend her ways (very common among the low-bred and ignorant women of easy virtue) then the husband can admonish her, and even stop sleeping with her, but if the corrective measures fail to refine her, he can take harsher steps to make her qanitatun (devoted and obedient to Allah).
To understand the true purport of this verse, it is essential to keep in mind verse 21 of al-Rum.
"Another of His signs is that He created out of you mates of your own kind so that you may find repose in them, and has instilled (ordained) love and kindness between you. Verily there are signs in this for those who reflect."
In many verses it has been ordained to, treat women with kindness and to speak to them gently.
The Holy Prophet said:
"Never beat Allah's handmaidens."
"The best of you is he who is kind to his wife."
There is not a single event of wife-beating or child-abuse in the lives of the Holy Prophet and his holy Ahl ul Bayt.
Fala tabghu alayhinna is a warning to the unscrupulous husbands not to seek an excuse for resorting to the conditional provision allowed to discipline the depraved women only.
Comments on this journal
Here is my post from Activism village (where everyone talks about injustice against muslims but fails to address injustice within the muslim ummah).
I think there are 3 kinds of profiles we are dealing with here. 1. The first ofcourse would be the average muslim woman. Most islamic cultures and social groups do not promote women to stand up against injustice, the injustice that could possibly be effecting her every day life situation...the injustice that could be caused by her husband directly. We all know how prevalent domestic abuse is in muslim families -either experiencing it first hand by our parents, or hearing about it through freinds. I'm not saying it doesnt exist outside of Islam but how many traditional muslim women do you know, especially those that immigrated and go to seek help in their community have actually been encouraged to gain the nerve to stand up to their husbands and say hell no!? The most they would be encouraged to do is pray for their husbands, or change their actions in some way to make their husband happier so the marriage could work through despite. 2. The second issue ofcourse would be the muslim man that feels "alarmed" by the connotations that feminism brings. I'm guessing this pertains to avoiding (or the fear of) engagement in "promiscuous" or "impure" actions. This is an issue that I would need another forum to discuss.....3. Lastly the third muslim man, the one who feels he'd never ever hurt his wife or future wife and how ideas of "feminism" do not apparently effect him directly. This idea in itself is a dangerous position, especially for a muslim man who's constantly pressured and encourage by society, family and religion that marriage in itself is the half-way step to heaven and piety. Being neutral keeps you not only blind and apathetic to the injustices occurring around you but if you ignore issues as domestic violence and pretend that it only occurs with "a$$holes", mysogynists, or the "unguided people" then you might be fooling yourself. Afterall someone who holds himself in such a high regard would hate to wake up one day and realize that what he did was harmful to her but she deserved it, or you had no control or, you know it was wrong but it was only this once and if you ask for forgiveness- God is merciful. ******Here's an idea if you have been accused of falling in the last category. Why not discuss it openly and address the issue for what it is? It might just prevent the situation from occurring in the first place? Is it really worth the outcome of avoiding taboo.////*** Unfortunately, every time i get to the line listed in this post about the nature of a Man/Woman's relationship in the Quran it disturbs me immensely. Mashallah, I have been married to a very gentle and humble man for a year and a half now (I may be young) but if this were to happen to me, I am not sure what I would do. Is murder in self defense a sin do you think?
Another issue....maybe I am misintrepreting this, but is all this implying that men are superior to women? That is not true and I cannot and will not ever believe that. Second, in today's day and age, particularly amongst Desi Muslims, men do NOT support their wives, because most wives work and are very highly educated and successful career women. These married women technically "support themselves"; most make just as much money as their husbands, if not more. So how does this all fit in?