13 ways to find out if you?re a lesbian

You?re sleeping over at a mate?s house. It?s hot so she gets naked. Do you:

a) Keep all your clothes on and hang onto the edge of the bed
b) Get undressed too. It sure is hot in here
c) Keep your clothes on to start with, but slowly take off layers. Then lie wide awake, awash in streams of cold sweat

If we were to tell you most girls have had a playful snog with another girl in their teens you?d say:

a) We were lying
b) Yeah, so? Everyone does a bit of sexual experimentation when they?re young
c) Most girls are probably too afraid to try

The last time you had a date?
a) Last night with this great new guy, which left you on cloud nine
b) Don?t know, some time in the last six months, but it doesn?t really bother you as your mates always ensure you have a brilliant time
c) You don?t have time for dates, most blokes are after just one thing anyway

Last night you dreamed about:
a) Getting a rub down by George Clooney
b) Starring in a love triangle between Arjun Rampal and Bipasha Basu
c) Appearing in a Destiny?s Child video

Your friends are mostly:
a) Girls in relationships
b) Boys and girls, but not many of them going steady
c) You have one best friend and she?s always being crapped on

You see men as:
a) Necessary but boy can they be idiots sometimes
b) Fun especially when they?re being idiots
c) Idiots

How do you get rid of a spider?
a) Kill it! Kill it! For god?s sake someone please kill it!
b) Ignore the little fella
c) Pick it up and let it out the window

What?s a diva?
a) A singer who throws tantrums
b) Someone who takes her art seriously
c) An amazing person brimming with style, confidence and personality

The club you?ve stumbled into drunk turns out to be a gay night. What do you do?
a) Turn on your heels and walk out. Did you see what that man was wearing on his nipple?
b) Whoop with joy. It?s going to be a great night
c) Feel embarrassed and deeply self-conscious

How do you dress?
a) To show how hot you are
b) To show how much fun you are
c) Not to show much, really

How do you react when aunties ask when you?re getting married?
a) Why, have they got someone in mind for you?
b) Tell them you?re too busy getting laid to decide
c) You want to punch their lights out

What?s the meaning of life?
a) And they lived happily ever after
b) Have a good time, all the time
c) You never get what you want in life. Deal with it?

You think the scene where Shabana Azmi took her knickers off and licked Nandita Das? nipples in the movie Fire was:
a) Disgusting
b) Artistic
c) The best thing you?ve seen since Rita Wolf whipped them out in My Beautiful laundrette

THE GAYDAR

MOSTLY A: You love men, always have, always will! You?re a girlie girl who regularly swoons over fit celebs with friends who share your mission: to have a wonderful wedding and live in a gorgeous house filled with pretty children. But because you can?t picture a life without men, you are unsettled by same-sex relationships to the point of homophobia. Just because someone is a lesbian doesn?t mean she?s going to jump your bones. Stop flattering yourself so much! Tolerance is the one virtue that makes for a well-rounded personality.

MOSTLY B: You are a tactile person who is open with her sexuality. The company of females is every bit as fun as being with boys, but you know the difference when it comes to sex. You know which one you want to have physical closeness with on an intimate level, but that?s not to say you don?t like the idea of the other either. Your ?it?s cool either way? attitude might land you in trouble, especially after a few beers. Be careful not to hurt anyone?s feelings in the name of curiosity.

MOSTLY C: Forget what others may think ? it?s time to confront your own feelings. Is it just that you?re not into men at the moment, or are your feelings for women too deep on both physical and emotional levels? Heterosexual women can have same-sex fantasies and some experiment, but only you can tell whether what you?re going through is a phase or the real deal. Try not to label yourself as a ?lesbian? unless you?re sure, because it may turn out you?re bisexual. It?s okay not to fancy boys, but don?t start hating them ? or yourself ? for it.