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Login to find out (May 7, 2005 at 2:42pm)
thanks Masooma...thats more like what i wanted to hear(smiley). And reminds me it was my colleagues who prohibited me from wearin black scarves sayin looks too stern and brighter colors make u less unapproachable and more normal which you need to be at work.
 
Login to find out (May 7, 2005 at 10:45am)
I think there is a little bit of cultural variation in that concept of not attracting attention. If I walk down the street here in an all back iranian or saudi chador, I will attract negative attention. If instead I dress in "pretty colors" that fit in with what everyone else wears, I don't draw unwanted attention, instead I blend in.
 
Login to find out (May 7, 2005 at 1:11am)
Well decentguy I have no doubt that hijab is an obligation and not a choice for muslimas. What sometmes frustrates me is that in real sense it means
we dont do anything to attract atention which is not possible when you spend most of your time at work in a position that requires people to pay attention to you. And one may want to wear pretty colors, clothes, shoes to please oneself and just to distract yourself from the dreary work routine....but that goes against the concept. Isnt that cruel?
 
Login to find out (May 7, 2005 at 1:01am)
After coming to USA I experienced the wonderful feeling of nationhood for first time when moslems though complete strangers from all nationalities say salam ( and some nonmoslem americans do too!)except for desee guys and ofcourse I always return the greeting. I know its not just me because my Syrian friend also asked why paki guys go weird if she just says salam to them.
 
Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 9:04pm)
awwe..I always say salam back....because I normally I can never tell if a guy is muslim...so if they say salam okay and if not...I would never know..lol...but I always respond no matter, just to be nice and as a good muslim...but sometimes....I don't know if they are saying salam to be kind or just to salam to get my attention?....but I still reply...hope that's not a bad thing?
 
Login to find out (May 6, 2005 at 12:42pm)
hijabi's tend to be more offputtish in my experience. don't know why. I say hi to most people who i recognize as muslim arab or, depending on the sitaution, santero's or puertoricans. it's a "strenght with numbers" thing. i like too feel i have compatriots in the anonymous masses. anyway. a hijabi is instantly recognizable as a muslim, so i say hi. and often i get very chilly reactions. i still do it, no worry. but it happens much more with a hijabi than with someone speaking arabic, ro someone with a small "allah" pendant, or a santero token or something. so, it's yo damn fault the other muslims don't say hi anymore. my poor broken haert fears more rejection ... :,(
 
Login to find out (May 5, 2005 at 9:28pm)
Iman, sorry I didn't have much to say on this, as I thought this is like a girlie discussion going on and Katie actually have put it in such a beautiful way, bravo Katie !! :)

I think when it comes to wearing hijab or not wearing it, intentions count the most. I know I would get ridiculed for saying that, but I think it is very valid that a number of people would wear hijab or for guys, grow beards, to get approval from the people around them.

You raised a very valid point about getting noticed, that hijabis actually attract more attention than non-hijabis, even those eyes would follow them, which might have overlooked them otherwise. Becuase its something out of norm for the people around us. I don't know if hijab serves its purpose in that case.

How I mentioned above, if intention is to stay modest, but have a decent professional appearance, in my opinion it really doesn't matter whether or not one wears hijab. But its my personal opinion, I am no scholar or shaikh. I think everybody should do their own soul searching and figure out how they want to present themselves and just do what fits best to their situation.
 
Login to find out (May 4, 2005 at 9:39pm)
Contrary to your experiences, my Paki friends tell me Paki guys are afraid to approach me BECOZ I wear hijab!!! ( wen i wondered why they cannot salam a fellow muslima/countrywoman unlike most other moslems) I have given up even trying to figure that out.
 
Login to find out (May 4, 2005 at 8:16pm)
well, i felt pressured to do it so that i could fit in with the muslims... and so the muslim guys at CAL would actually look me in the eye. (When i was Chritian they talked to me, etc., but when i converted they said they couldn't look at me because i was not wearing a hijab.) Just an example though... someone could wear it to feel like she is a good Muslim eventhough she may not be, she could wear it because her parents tell her to, because the guy she likes likes hijabi's, etc. :)
 
Login to find out (May 4, 2005 at 7:42pm)
Wearing Hijab "to fit in".....is a very new concept to me. As thats what makes me and the few other hijabees i know stick out like a sore thumb!
 
Login to find out (May 4, 2005 at 3:35pm)
as long as your reasons for what you do is good (wearing hijab for modesty and not just because you want to fit in or something) and you are constantly striving to be good, the rest isn't as important. the point you raise about makeup is good i think... as was their point about shoes. If you believe in dressing modestly and not being materialistic or trying to be sexy (as many women SAY they do), then your actions and outward appearance will show that or will show you as a hypocryte. BUT there is validity to wearing it for yourself - but maybe just wearing it in the home or something is best. as far as nice shoes go, be comfortable - and again, INTENTION is what matters.
 
Login to find out (May 4, 2005 at 3:28pm)
yeah, foot fetishes are common. but people are strange - esp when it comes to what turns them on. Iman, your responsibility is yourself and making your intentions good. Obviously you work hard to be morally upright and do what u think it right. you analyze it and you ask others for their opinions. There is nothing more you can do but to pray for these people. If they use your clothes, feet, etc in a negitive way, that is outside of you and your responsibility. We (human beings, not just women) should not hide from the world because someone might disrespect us or use us as a launching pad for sin, but go out into the world as a good example - serve others and be good yourself.
 
Login to find out (April 30, 2005 at 8:53pm)
Gosh! that was hypothetical conjecturin on part of my women colleagues ......but F-dog( pardon me) talking about ur side of specie...actually the nurses joked about a caucasian doc who got extremely uncomfy if some woman with pretty feet walked into his clinic. And lol u dont even know how funny ur statement is.
 
Login to find out (April 30, 2005 at 8:45pm)
leave that "wearing gloves" n "working with kafir" 's issue but just see what Almighty Allah ordered n what Prophet SAW taught us to do..n there isnt any doubt that they said which is best for us.. as They care of us most!
 
Login to find out (April 30, 2005 at 7:54pm)
lool the guy got turned on because of your feet....man this isnt afghanistan
 
Login to find out (April 30, 2005 at 7:27pm)
sorry iman that u had such a bad day at work! *hugs* I have felt like this too (although not to the extreame you have *s*)but i can sympathize. of course, easiest "advice" is to listen to your heart, to pray and to have good intentions. we can not be responsible for other people's sins that we did not intentionally affect. As far as what i, personally, think of the issue... i'll post later inshaAllah. (don;t u just love suspence?!)